Anxiety and I share a soul. We never get a break from one another and the reality of it is worse than it would be bathing a bulimic arsonist with explosive diarrhea.

Heh. Humor is the only way I know how to deal with anxiety, but sometimes it isn’t possible. Another thing that helps me is the realization that many other people deal with it too. There are things that we all stress out about that really aren’t that big of a deal, and we know that they aren’t, but still panic over them. For some reason, that is how we are wired and can’t help it.

This post will hopefully help distract you from whatever you are dealing with. So, let’s just go ahead and make fun of ourselves for a little bit by going over some common things that all of us anxiety-prone people deal with on the daily!

1.  Why Is that Person Staring at Me?!

You know what I am talking about. Most people just let it roll off their back, but us stressed out folks wonder the following:

” Is there something on my face? A booger? Smeared makeup? Drool? “

“OMG They think I am a hideous freak. I wish they knew that I know I am ugly, so that they don’t think that I think I am attractive!”

2. NO!! Why Can’t I Just Text Them?!

Every time we have to call someone and don’t we don’t have the option to text, we go through this process:

Take a deep Breath:

Stare at your phone in fear for a few minutes:

Dial the area code and take a breather..baby steps….

Put the phone down and tell yourself “I’ll do it later”

Later, you bravely pick up the phone, dial the entire number and your palms start to sweat because the phone is dialing:

As you continue to hear the dial tones, you recite a prayer of desperation in hopes that they don’t answer so you can leave a voicemail:

Then, three possible outcomes occur:

A. They answer and you have to start talking:

B. They don’t answer, and you get to leave a voicemail:

C. You hang up and panic….again

3. Are you Mad at Me?

Yeah, we always need reassurance that someone isn’t mad at us.

“You look mad….was it something I did?”

4. OMG. Did I Really Just Say That?

Yeah, you know that moment when you say something so freaking ridiculously stupid and you dwell on it still….5 years after you said it.

5.  All the Self-Checkouts are closed…..NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6. These Shoes Make me Look Fat.

Yeah – distorted thinking is in our blood! Can’t wait to take these shoes off so I look skinny again!

7. They Haven’t Replied to My Text Yet — They HATE me!

I am definitely guilty of this one. You go through a million thoughts…including:

Oh, man they think what I said was stupid so now they are going to ignore me forever!!!!!! I’M A FREAK!

8. Seeing Someone you ‘Kind of’ Know in Public Makes You Want to Die.

What do I do? Do I hide? Or say Hello? Do I pretend I don’t see them? Do I pretend I’m on the phone so they don’t come over here?

Oh crap, I accidentally made eye contact so here comes the awkwardness!

9.  Being Alone With Someone In an Elevator

Sooooo…..

10.  Sounds….

Was that an intruder? Is Jeffrey Dahmer back from the dead to eat me? Is it a fat rat coming for that shred of taco cheese I knowingly left on the kitchen floor? Am I just hearing things? I’m going crazy…that’s it…oh great now I am going to get put in the loony bin.

And we all know there’s more where that came from…

I swear, anxiety prevents us from doing so many things in life, and an important thing I have learned recently, also called “the 5 second rule” (No, not the food rule) has helped me a lot! Check out this video from Mel Robbins:

Anxiety SUCKS. I KNOW. OH TRUST ME, I KNOW. Here are some things that help anxiety, or can help to make it more manageable!

Genius Joy Supplement

Of course, this isn’t going to make you instantly happy, but it can help you feel less tense and anxiety-ridden. Try it from Amazon: Genius Joy

Every single ingredient is backed by research to serve a true purpose & make a lasting difference. It’s an alternative to stimulant based prescriptions that doctor’s pass out like candy nowadays! Get nootropic performance, stress relief and natural anxiety relief instead of turning to and anti anxiety medications!

Genius Joy

Anxiety Bracelet

This bracelet is actually useful because it reminds you that your anxiety is lying to you. I love this!

Get it here: Anxiety Bracelet

Anxiety Journal

I have a lot of CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) books and Mindfulness books and this is one of the good ones for calming yourself at the end of a stressful day or during a stressful day wherever you may need it.

Check it out here: Anxiety Journal

Poop Anxiety Stress Balls

When you’re stressed or full of raging anxiety, what better what to calm down than to squeeze these colorful, bead-filled, poop-shaped balls?!

Get on Amazon: Poop Emoji Stress Balls